Fantasy Football

Alright, this is getting incredibly tedious looking for headlines to offer big picture perspectives on here. So I think starting tomorrow we’re going to start breaking down every team from a fantasy perspective: who to draft where, who to avoid when, dark horses and busts, the whole nine. We’re going to try and write this from the perspective of the coach, and what strategies give the team the best chance of winning, because that’s going to dictate who accumulates the most statistical productivity. It seems like someone could actually benefit from such work, as opposed to me just looking for filler so this site doesn’t go on indefinite hiatus.

But anyhow, there are a couple news items that kinda sorta warrant mentioning, but I wouldn’t get too excited. This isn’t a fantasy football equivalent of Michael Jackson dying, it’s more like the lead singer of Good Charlotte springing his pinkie finger. Ugh, I’ve already spent too much time talking about this.

It’s a couple days old now, but Joe Jurevicius is suing the Cleveland Browns for the unsanitary conditions in their locker room that led to his and others staph infections (most notably Kellen Winslow). This really does raise some eyebrows, and the sanitation in the Browns locker room is a great metaphor for the general disarray of the franchise. But damn, Joe, it isn’t like this team doesn’t already have enough problems without you slapping them in the face with (at least on the surface of it) perfectly legitimate lawsuits.

Unlike The Browns, Joe Banner knows how to run a professional sports franchise.

Anyhow, if you’re looking for a fantasy angle from this story, how’s this: don’t draft any Cleveland Browns. Or if you have too, limit yourself to drafting them about three rounds later than the median of all the fantasy rankings you happen to read. There is always going to be someone more reliable at that point in the draft than who Cleveland has to offer.

LeSean McCoy and the Philadelphia Eagles have reached an agreement, which is good news for Philly fans who’ve needed a respectable backup running back ever since Deuce fucking Staley left town. With him safely in the number two slot, I’d be cautious about Brian Westbrook, who’s perennially listed on the probable/questionable board and can be seen limping during warm-ups on a weekly basis. With someone like McCoy to pick up the slack, they’re going to be a lot more conservative with Westbrook and a lot more liberal with McCoy.

That’s not to say Westbrook is in Cleveland Browns territory, not by a mile. But if all things are equal between him and, say, Michael Turner or Marshawn Lynch, I might opt for the alternatives. His fantasy reign has been tremendous, but I think this is when the Eagles start their transition, you might want to do the same.