Fantasy Football

We’re down to two playoff games for these weekly recaps, and it is starting to dawn on us that while we’re going to struggle for material for the next couple weeks, we have nary a clue how we are going to keep this site updated during the off-season. You can only make so many LenDale White fat jokes before they start to get old. Obviously we’re going to be forced to move onto La’Ron McClain fat jokes.

Anyhow, it was an interesting day of games yesterday. But probably the most peculiar thing about it, and we should have caught it on Thursday or Friday, is that the NFC title game was the earlier broadcast. Considering, you know, the other game was in Pittsburgh, outdoors and in the eastern time zone; it seems like that would be an ideal afternoon game. At least when the other option is indoors, in Arizona and on pacific time. But what do I know? I guess it makes as much sense as Arizona being allowed to play the game at home in the first place.

But even all that taken under advisement there was a better reason to play the AFC game early: Namely, it was boring as shit. Sure, if you’re a fan of one of the two teams you saw it as an old school, hard hitting battle between divisional foes. If you’re a neutral observer like me and most of the country, you were struggling to keep your eyes open after the two hour first half that resulted in 20 total points. And that 20 wasn’t exactly thrilling. I know this is how football is “supposed” to be played, but when I’m kind of burnt out on it and it’s over two hours to play thirty minutes and neither team is of particular interest, our interest tends to wane.

To summarize because it’s obligatory, Joe Flacco’s inexperience finally cost Baltimore (as it should), as he threw three interceptions and barely cracked 33% completion percentage (13/30). Outside of Pitt’s defense, no one really performed exceptionally for Pittsburgh. Several dropped passes, and a number of shaky throws from Roethlisberger, Pittsburgh’s defense managed to carry the day that was highlighted with a Troy Polamalu pick-six (which we claimed would happen in the first quarter but it’s not on record so why do I bother mentioning it?).

For what it’s worth, when he’s dead set on winning a game, I really don’t think there’s a better defender in the league than Polamalu, who hones in on the ball like a guided missile. For all the talk of Ed Reed and Ray Lewis, Polamalu outclassed them all in this contest.

Maybe the hair has a device that tracks synthesized leather.

Set aside the fact that it was fairly uninspired play on the offensive end (penalties seemed to count for as much as actual plays) and a four hour running time that was beyond all comprehension, the game just had no storyline beyond the petulant trash talking between several notable players. Some are intrigued by this, for us, it’s just another reason to dislike both already dislikable teams. The bickering wouldn’t be interesting to anyone if it wasn’t for the fact that we’re all familiar with those involved, the comments themselves are about two notches below “yo’ momma’” jokes and the whole thing just wreaks of self-absorption. For some of these guys to say some of the shit they do in a public venue, is a good testament too how many times they’ve been reminded of how special they are.

Of course, I hate to complain about the duration of time the game took to play out, so please take into consideration I wrote the last paragraph before Willis McGahee’s injury. Poor bastard. Can this guy go a couple seasons without sustaining some kind of horrific injury? First there was this and now we have this. Can’t this guy just sustain something like a bone bruise? Does it always have to be career threatening? Two things were refreshing about what happened in the aftermath: 1) He moved, with relative ease and regularity and 2) The Pittsburgh fans wishing him well as he was being carted through the tunnel (though I’m not sure they would have been so convivial had the Steelers been losing).

Since that is all that really happened in that game, let’s move onto the NFC which proved a little more theatric.

In short: Philly deserved to lose: Dropped passes, turnovers, shaky defense for three of four quarters. These are not the standard makings of a winning football performance. Arizona kind of impressed me, they came close to catching a few breaks (the Boldin catch after the missed interception, the missed kickoff catch from Philly that the return man shouldn’t have been going for in the first place, followed by the Arizona recovery after the ball looked like stayed in bounds that was ultimately ruled out), and managed to hold onto the win after blowing an 18 point halftime lead.

Usually when a team as experienced and (recently) adept as Philly builds momentum like that, they never relent. But ‘Zona proved resilient by putting together an efficient and crucial touchdown drive late in the fourth capped off by a converted two point conversion. It’s a good thing the subsequent defensive stop gave us the obligatory controversial call/non-call towards the end of the game, otherwise what would we have to argue about. Personally, I don’t know how you cannot call that. Having a game be decided on a 4th and 10 pass play in which the defender (intentionally or otherwise) knocks down the receiver before he has an opportunity to catch the ball seems a bit ill-advised. But if they are certain that the defender knocked down Curtis accidentally (unless he stumbled backwards into him while blindfolded, I don’t know how you can be certain of that) then I guess that is the call they have to make.

I mean, if the call goes the other way, the Cardinals still have plenty of chances to stop them even if they do convert that fourth down. And even if Philly does get in the end zone, they still have an overtime to sort out who wins. Right now it looks like a game that came down to a potentially errant decision by the officials to refrain from making a semi-obvious call under the guise of “letting them play”.

Anyhow, if Philly was going to lose it’s probably better that the botched plays on special teams (missed field goal and extra point, terrible two-point conversion attempt as a result of those kicks) weren’t the result. The riots following the game would make those after the world series win look like a good-natured game of Candyland.

So this is our Super Bowl matchup: The Arizona Cardinals vs. The Pittsburgh Steelers. On one side: The gritty underdog that no one gave a chance to get past the second round, catching fire at the right time to knock off three favorites in fairly dramatic fashion. On the other side we have the team that was considered second best in their own conference all season, who played the toughest schedule in NFL history (nine games against playoff teams) and who’s defensive consistency is their defining characteristic. I’ll let you guess which is which, but we will say one thing: We’re actually excited for this game. As much as we like to discredit the Cardinals and consider them benefactors of a seriously flawed playoff format, they are in the Super Bowl, and we can’t think of a better conclusion to a season as fucked up as this one than a Arizona Cardinals Super Bowl victory.

It for today, back tomorrow with something.